Tip #3: Hold Hands

Everyone agrees it is super cute when really old people hold hands.  Why? I think because it is very rare.  It is like seeing a mullet nowadays.  It doesn’t happen often, but you can’t look away when it does.  Why is it so rare? Let’s investigate...

I work with middle schoolers at church, and I LOVE LOVE it.  What I don’t love is seeing them ‘in relationships’ with one another.  I don’t like it because I have been doing this ministry thing long enough to pretty much know how it’s gonna end...and it is ugly.  I see fb posts like ‘Why does this hurt so bad’ and ‘</3’ (that's a broken heart symbol for all those who may be confused) ALL THE TIME! That being said, I would like to ask this question: why do the students in these relationships lasting a day to several months usually show more affection and passion for one another than those in a covenant of marriage together?  A place where passion and affection actually belong.  Yes, I realize that some of it is because they are young and don’t really know what to do with strong emotions (I hope you are not offended if you are reading this, guys. You know I love you!). Ultimately, though, they are trying to enjoy the benefits of marriage without the covenant- hence the fb posts. We, on the other hand, HAVE the benefit of the covenant, so why aren’t we enjoying all the perks?

As married folks, I think we can just get plain lazy about this.  Like I said in my earlier post, when we get married, God does something miraculous in the unseen.  He makes us one.  We cleave together (yup-cleave...it has 2 opposite definitions: to divide and to adhere). Our spirits are united, but sometimes I think we forget about the ‘outward’ connections.  There is something sweet, simple, and unifying about holding hands.  I don’t know what it is, but it is great! Don’t wait for a night set apart as a ‘date’ to take the opportunity. When you go grocery shopping, hold hands.  When you’re in the car, hold hands.  When you’re grabbing lunch at McDonalds, hold hands.  When you’re watching TV at home, hold hands. And my favorite, as you fall asleep, hold hands.  It is a simple act that can become significant if you allow it.  Married friends, let’s start showing these students that, in the right context, showing affection is a great privilege and doesn’t need to end in heartbreak.  In fact, when it is between a husband and wife, it can be a simple physical way to strengthen and encourage the bond that God has made between us.  

Alright, husband and wives, go hold hands! 

Prayer: Lord, thank you. Thank you for who you are in my marriage.  Thank you for blessing me with the best husband in the world.  I pray for me and those reading this that you would help us not get lazy about the 2nd most important relationship in our lives.  Remind us, God, of the passion that brought us together and help us to not take for granted even the simple benefits of being ‘one’. We love you! Amen.